Your Uber

Sorry for any confusion, but yes – this is an Uber!

If you’re too warm or cold, just say the word! I’m really bad at remembering to check that stuff, so feel free to speak up anytime.

I’ll usually stay quiet unless you start a conversation. I’m super friendly — just don’t want to talk your ear off. If you feel like chatting, awesome. If not, I respect the silence.

Use the green USB-C cable to plug in your own music device if you’d like. If you want the volume changed, just let me know — happy to adjust!

It really helps when riders leave a quick review. Just a few words like "friendly" or "clean car" make a difference and help me stay on the road. I appreciate it!

My name is Austin, I'm 33 and I am from Illinois originally. I have been driving with Uber for about a year, driving passengers for about 2 months. I have lived in Saint Paul for about 6 years, and am transitioning to Uber after working as a store manager for KFC for 5 years. I am huge on making people happy, so let me know if there is anything (well, anything reasonable...) I can do to make you happier during your ride.

Here is a list of things that ChatGPT thinks you don't already know...

• Octopuses have three hearts. Two pump blood to the gills; one to the rest of the body.
• Humans glow in the dark. It's called bioluminescence, but it's 1,000 times dimmer than our eyes can detect.
• Bananas are radioactive. They contain potassium-40, a naturally occurring isotope.
• Sharks existed before trees. Sharks have been around for about 400 million years. Trees, 350 million.
• Wombat poop is cube-shaped. Helps it not roll away. Yes, really.
• The Eiffel Tower grows in summer. It can expand over 6 inches due to metal expansion in heat.
• There's a species of jellyfish that’s biologically immortal. Turritopsis dohrnii resets its life cycle.
• Sloths can hold their breath longer than dolphins. Sloths: 40 minutes. Dolphins: ~10 minutes.
• Hot water can freeze faster than cold. It’s called the Mpemba effect. Still debated why.
• Scotland's national animal is the unicorn. They chose it as a symbol of purity and power.
• Butterflies can taste with their feet. They have taste sensors on their tarsi.
• You can smell rain. It’s the scent of geosmin, a compound released by soil-dwelling bacteria.
• There's a planet where it rains molten glass sideways. HD 189733b. Winds reach 5,400 mph.
• The moon has moonquakes. Caused by tidal forces from Earth’s gravity.
• A group of flamingos is called a “flamboyance.” Yes, that's official.
• Humans share about 60% of their DNA with bananas. But don't get cocky, we're still smarter.
• Cows have best friends. And they get stressed when separated.
• Snails can sleep for up to 3 years. Usually during drought to conserve moisture.
• Sea otters hold hands while sleeping. So they don’t drift apart. 😭
• A day on Venus is longer than its year. It spins very slowly but orbits the sun faster.
• The inventor of the Pringles can is buried in one. His ashes, not his whole body. Still weirdly poetic.
• Rabbits can’t puke. They physically can’t reverse their digestive tract.
• There's a “fear of long words” that's ironically long. Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia. Yeah.
• There are more trees on Earth than stars in the Milky Way. ~3 trillion trees vs. ~100–400 billion stars.
• The first oranges weren’t orange. They were green in Southeast Asia.
• Koalas have fingerprints almost identical to humans. Even under a microscope, hard to tell apart.
• Sharks don’t get cancer often. But no, they aren’t “immune.” Just low incidence.
• A blue whale’s heart is the size of a small car. Weighs over 400 pounds.
• Humans can’t swallow and breathe at the same time. Evolution’s safety mechanism at work.
• The dot over a lowercase “i” or “j” is called a “tittle.” Not a joke. That's its real name.